| SUV's- 
              The Silent Majority I'm sure you've all heard 
              the health warning, we are what we eat, but did you know that we 
              are also what we drive? The automobile, whether it's sitting in 
              a flower garden looking like a giant 
              flower pot, or racing down Interstate 85 at 80 miles per hour 
              is a reflection of who we are. Every morning we climb into the clothes 
              that define who we are and then climb into our car that defines 
              who we are and then climb into our job that defines where we don't 
              want to be. When someone sees you 
              driving, they have a basic idea of who you are, but some people 
              want to be better defined, so they add that little extra umph to 
              help define themselves by putting a bumper sticker on their car(The 
              "bumper sticker" has evolved in the last century from 
              meaning a sticker placed on the bumper of a car to a sticker placed 
              anywhere on your car.) According to our survey(See picture below). 
              50% of all vehicles on the road are SUV's, but according to another 
              survey we took 99% of SUV's don't have bumper stickers. 
              
                |  A The Carrboro News 
                    fact: Clearly 50% of all vehicles in parking lots(and therefore 
                    on the road) are SUV's. |  The Carrboro News believes 
              there are a number of reasons why SUV's don't have bumper stickers(Most 
              notable missing bumper sticker is the yellow ribbon that says "We 
              support our troops". We spoke to the upstanding citizens of 
              Carrboro and the consensus seems to be that SUV people are in a 
              bit of a quandry. Most do support our troops and would like to display 
              a sticker to make it known, but on the other hand they also recognize 
              that our dependence on foreign oil is also in part due to the fact 
              that we drive so many gas guzzling vehicles. So what do you do? 
              Show your support with a support the troops bumper sticker and have 
              people look at you with eyes that say "If you want to really 
              support our troops, why don't you get rid of your gas-guzzling pig?" 
              or you can not display the bumper sticker and have people look at 
              you thinking "Why don't you sell your car and buy something 
              a little more efficient so we don't remain so dependent on foreign 
              oil!." 
               
                |  |  |   
                | These 
                    big boys don't need bumper stickers anyway... everyone knows 
                    what their owners think! |  One resident, who wishes 
              to remain anonymous suggested that maybe the SUV'sy used to have 
              "support the troops" magnetic bumper stickers but they 
              fell off because the distributor, trying to save money and going 
              on Bush's assertion that the war would be short-lived opted for 
              the less expensive magnet that only sticks for 6 months.
 
              Anyway, enough battering 
            of the SUV's by The Carrboro News.... Let's see what our readers think! 
                |  | "God 
                  Bless America" and a Florida license plate. There's no 
                  doubt what this owner believes. |   
                |  |   
                |  | We're 
                  sure that Bush-Cheney both appreciate this SUV owners support. 
                  And the revenue the oil companies are raking in from SUV gas 
                  sales. |   
                |  |  
 
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